We had 17 entrants in the “Most Embarrassing Moments” contest. Listed below (and edited for length etc.), click here to vote in the forums. Voting will close on Tuesday night (August 10) at 10 p.m.
1. Holey Pockets
I was a ref for a kids game and I had to stop play because of an extra puck on the ice. Being unsure where the extra puck came from, I put the extra puck in my pocket and resumed play. A couple of minutes later, we had to stop play again, because of yet another extra puck on the ice. It wasn’t until after this second time that I realized I had a hole in my pocket.
2. Beware of Skate Guards
I forget to take my skate guards off. Once, and only once.
3. Remember Your Breezers
I’ve watched a few people in the locker room–some experienced JMSers–put on their shin pads, socks, skates, tape it all together… and then realize they forgot to put breezers on. One guy even tried to fit his breezers over his skates. That was kinda funny.
4. Just Like the Wild
I had heard that the Minnesota Wild players were complaining about the ice at the –they were pulling hamstring muscles. So when we at JMS played there, I went on the ice with my camcorder and WHAMMO! Ten seconds in, I pulled a hamstring muscle! I still played, however… it was The Excel Center, after all.
5. Hanging by a Thread
It was my turn to jump over the boards and go on the ice. As I was going over, unbeknownst to me, the cinching cord on my breezers got caught in the crack of the door behind me. I was going forward and felt that I was stuck–I could only get about three inches between me and the boards.
I tried to get the cord free, but I couldn’t reach it–I could barely turn around but somehow I managed to reach the door handle, but I couldn’t budge it because the end of the cord (with a little plastic piece on it) was jamming it shut.
My team was trying to figure out why I was just standing there as the game was going on. Once they realized I was stuck, two of them worked to free me. One guy yanked on the door a few times but even he couldn’t open it. It actually took them about a minute to figure out how to get the door open and free me.
At least I didn’t fall–that could have turned out pretty badly with me hanging there by my breezers.
6. Mite Mistake
I was a mite playing one of my first games as a goalie. My team was up by one goal and the clock was running down. The other team got a shot on me and I made the save. I covered the puck, but my coach yelled to throw it behind the net, to kill time. So I swung my arm with all of my might… and I slid the puck right into the back of the net. Oh man! I tied the game for the other team! I was mortified. My team was really mad at me, but luckily we were all only 7 or 8 years old, so they did not remember it for very long.
7. Right Position, Wrong Team
At a JMS game just a few weeks ago, I was coming off the ice from my first shift. I started heading towards “my” bench, shouting, “Right wing! Right wing!” but everyone on the bench was just staring at me… Then I realized that I was heading towards and shouting at the dark team’s bench… while wearing my white jersey. Guess I had been playing on the dark side a bit prior to that.
8. Neon Yellow Fizz
I was goaltending my third game of the afternoon–the first two were roller hockey in St. Paul. THis one was on the ice. It was a very hot summer and I was coming out of the hot box of Highland to the freezer of Richfield rink 1.
I was asked to fill in by B-level players and little did I know they were going against Johnny Pohl and Krissy Wendel (when they were in high school). They were schooling us and laughing.
I threw up in my helmet. I was on all fours when I pulled it off to dry heave into the back of the net.
I took my jersey off to mop up the Accelerade and (undigested) Power Bad from the crease as the opposition paraded by to get a look-see at my pool of neon yellow fizz. I went to the bench to rinse off my helmet and get a new jersey from my bag (which was conveniently on the bench). And returned for more fun action. It all took but three minutes. Or so it seemed.
9. The Highlight Reel
About seven years ago, I was playing my first and only pick-up game at historic and celebrated Mariucci Arena. I was on the bench and was supposed to be the next guy out on the ice. The guy coming off the ice yells out, “Center!” As I try to do my hockey hop over the boards, I fall back down into the bench. And if that isn’t bad enough, I can’t get back up!
Finally, after flailing around for about 30 seconds, the guys on my team help me up… but not before I missed my shift.
To make matters worse, I find out there’s a guy on the other end of the ice, recording the game, and he got it on tape. So yes, not only was it one of the most embarrassing moments in my hockey life–it also got posted online! Yeah, yikes!
10. Bustin’ Out
I spent a good amount of time trying on shoulder pads one day and found a pair that fit nicely, but it seemed like they were shaped funny…
The nice sales associate tried to keep a straight face as he explained to the grown man that he was wearing women’s shoulder pads.
Mine was more of half a game… I was on D and charging up the center of the ice with the puck A guy who was a lot smaller than me (who had been trying to check me all game in a non-checking league) decided to skate in front of me and square up. He was a head shorter than me so I didn’t try to stop. When we collided, I ran him over, but my head snapped forward and hit the top of his helmet.
From there on out, I didn’t remember a whole lot. Apparently I looked drunk all game (and since it was an adult league, they probably assumed I was).
At the start of the third period, I lined up and was waiting for the drop with my hands on my knees–my hands, mind you, not my gloves. So, after a second, I stopped the faceoff and went over to the bench and grabbed my gloves… both teams watching me and the ref giving me a weird face.
I lined back up and the puck dropped. About ten seconds later, I realized I didn’t have a stick! So I skated over to the boards and grabbed the first stick I saw–which happened to be for a 5’0″ left-hander. I am 6’2″ and a righty.
Needless to say, it was the funniest concussion any of us have seen, and when I talk to people who were in that league with me six years ago, they still bring it up.